Friday, January 09, 2009

Hardheaded, Stiffnecked and rebellious...yep that's me :(

Disclaimer * This post is for real folks with real issues . real cravings they are trying to overcome . All the perfect people go no further . I am being open with my struggles in the hope that someone else might be encouraged . Read on * end disclaimer .


Spend a little time in God's word and IF you are open to the spirit He will speak.
I got read nicely today but I take it as God's great love for His daughter :) I have been struggling with my weight for almost 16 years now. It all started after I had a major injury which required my left ankle to be fused. Limited mobility plus a love for the 4 cc's ( cookies , cakes , candies and chips) equal an increasingly plump me .

While attending Andrews University in Berrien Springs , MI I heard the Lord clearly say to me one day IF you want to lose the weight eat Genesis 1:29 . I knew what it said but was hoping and praying that it wasn;t what God was asking or telling me to do . But alas it was . IF I wanted weight control I needed to become a VEGAN!!! ..ugggghhhhhhh x 29376292420.

I have since been on the vegan wagon and off again x almost six years. When I am obedient to the instruction of the Lord the weight comes down . When I fall over ( usually d/t chicken and just eating to much unhealthy stuff) the weight comes back with a vengeance !

I have had two experience where I knew that God was giving me a warning in regards to my diet because I now know that it is really deeper that what I put in my mouth. It is about what controls me . What I am weak to. The first time was after I had gone to IHOP for breakfast after work on morning . Then went to my friend home because my apartment was being shown( the landlord was selling the place) that morning . I fell asleep but awoke with a start. I heard the Lord say to me "Esau lost his birth right for a bowl of porridge "( see Genesis 25:28-34) .I knew immediately what God was saying to me . Your lack of control is going to cost you if you keep it up. Well I have kept it up and it has cost me . I am now heavier than I've ever been and my my cholesterol is high .

Today while having devotion I read about Moses, the Children of Israel and the quail ( see Number chapter 11) .Well another revelation came on the whole diet / control / sin war . Here's the synopsis. The mixed multitude that came out of Egypt with the children of Israel ( C.O.I for short ) started to complain about the daily provision of manna . They wanted the foods left behind in Egypt. They incited the C.O.I to complain also and Moses is in a hot mess. He complaints to God about these hardheaded people he has been assigned to care for . God gives instruction for him to pick 70 elders to assist in leading the people. Then He told Moses that he was going to give the C.O.I their heats desire ...meat . God does indeed send quail ., large amount in fact but before they can even enjoy it judgment comes. God sends a plague and all those who gave into their CRAVINGS were killed . This thing hit me like a ton of brinks. The cravings caused them to rebel against the man of God and complain to God because they desired what they had left behind in Egypt more that what G.od was giving them everyday ( which BTW had been sustaining them with NO PROBLEM)

So what does this mean for me or anyone who is struggling with cravings( any type) ?.....

#1- God provision is better that what we are craving . He knows what we need
#2-Negative cravings always come from the flesh
#3 Negative cravings ALWAYS have consequences.
#4 We spit in the face of God when we do not appreciate the provision already supplied for us which have been sustaining us. God stopped the manna when they could harvest and gather for themselves after they reached the promised land ( this is so deep will need a post all by itself )

So for me God is saying your cravings have cost you and will end up killing you or at least have continued consequence UNLESS you stop giving in to the cravings . Cravings kill. umm and they aren't always revolving food folks.

Deep . More to follow . Will break down the points later .Just pray for me as I become obedient to the word spoken to me and fight the cravings ( the flesh) by the power of the Manna which has already been provided for me ! Hup and Glory.

Blessings and Happy Sabbath.


Monday, January 05, 2009

I begin again

As the new year has begun I am reflecting on goals not met in 2008 and things that need to be done. I realize that I have all the tools in my possession already to change my circumstances( that will preach right there) . So I have begun anew and these are the things that I will focus on for 2009 and prayerfully by the grace of God I will be in a better place come January 2010.

#1- Growth in the Lord

I have been reading my blogs and the recurrent them is my inconsistent walk with the Lord. I yet again come to the realization that I am as close to God as I want to be. It is me not God who is the problem . So my journey this year will be to get a close as possible.

#2- The weight has gotta go!

Because I am a health professional and just have common sense I know that my current weight is too much for my frame. It would be ok IF I was taller ..say like 5'5 but at 5"0 it is a no -no. So this morning as I'm looking through a book I realize between the Bible , exercise videos/dvd's , gym membership and a trampoline in my home I have no excuse!!! 50 Lbs off prayerful by the end of August . If not then at least by December 31, 2009!

#3- Financial Stability

I am returning to Andrews University in 2010 to complete by MDiv. I want to be free of all debt ( except for my car) by then . So I'm on a 16 month payoff plan. Dave Ramsey says" if you can live like no one else you can then live like no one else". In the words of my friend Andrew Francis "Simplify " is the word until my goal is met.

So now I have put my goals for this year on paper per say . Time to get crackin!

Pray for me y'all . I'm scared 2009 is the year of change in more ways than on. So let it be written , So let it be done!